Now that Christmas is not so far away, we are having a fresh round of them… the end-of-year cocktail party.

I go when invited but more out of curiosity than anything else. It is always the same. How easy it would be to hang out in a corner balancing a glass of something, paper napkin and fussy nibble, and not get to speak to anyone at all. Why must it always be me to initiate and maintain a conversation, or else stand around on my own? How much the others like to talk about themselves with seldom a genuine question in return. Then when there is space for some comment, all care must be taken to keep it well under 50 words max as the average cocktail party attention span usually doesn’t go over that. Brief, witty and pithy is what works.

Sometimes it is more inspiring just to observe. So few people really listen, really attend, or show any real interest on these occasions. My observations have lead me to contemplate just how self-centred we can be. Last night, although I spoke with others, listened and responded thoughtfully - bright, witty and pithy - nobody, absolutely nobody, asked me anything pertaining to myself at all. What a dull and boring type I must appear! I should probably ask my hairdresser to dye my locks that new electric lime colour next time. Maybe that would provoke a question. Or might I just be marginalized back into the corner with a plate of delicious chocolate-dipped strawberries all to myself? Given the strawberries and a half-good shiraz, things could always be worse.

Know how to listen and you will profit even from those who talk badly. Plutarch

Sometimes these thoughts on self-centredness lead me back to this whole blogging thing. Why do I think anyone is really interested in what I have to say? And interested enough that I should publish it world-wide at that? Well, I did say in the beginning that this was kind of an experiment… I’d see how it worked out.

But there are things that I believe important to be made known. There is a lot of misinformation and ignorance out there in the world, folks being fooled into following what has been dishonestly told to them, or not asking good questions and listening, really listening, to whether the answers make any real sense. Sometimes it seems that the 50 words max attention span is not just a cocktail party phenomenon, fish bowled for more poignant revelation, but true of the rest of life also. How much do we prefer to talk than to listen? After all, it takes effort to actively listen, to think critically about what is heard, and to respond appropriately with some perceptiveness, sensitivity and understanding. It may also require a change of mind, but the odds are high that something worthwhile will be learnt from doing so. And although it may be quite blatantly self-centred of me to consider my thoughts worthy of world-wide publication, I still hope that doing so may have others consider what truth they know and what it is that actually verifies it.

It is what we know already that often prevents us from learning. Claude Bernard

The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn. Alvin Toffler

Proverbs 18: 2 A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.